Garbage cookies

In a final attempt to take advantage of an empty house, I decided to have a barbecue a few days before my housemates returned. I had been anticipating a BBQ with much excitement for many months, frequently planning one only to be foiled by rain, parents, or some combination of the two. This time would be different. The month-long downpour been fully replaced by sun; parental units were in Africa; 10 hot dogs cost a dollar at safeway. Nothing could stop me. Or so I thought...

During the winter months, my barbecue had been stashed away in the basement for safekeeping. Thirty minutes before my first guest was meant to arrive, I delved into the depths of the clutter and began yanking the big black UFO-like object from its hiding place. I got it past one doorway and was moving towards the second one when a heavy metal pole collided painfully with my bare foot. After screaming in pain for a few minutes, I turned my gaze downward to confront my attacker. It turned out to be none other than one of the legs of the barbecue. "Hmm," I thought, perplexed. "I didn't realize our barbecue was collapsible." I left the leg alone, as it was still attached (albeit loosely) to the bottom of the apparatus, and recommenced dragging. I had barely moved a foot before my shin became the victim of yet another brutal attack, this time by another barbecue leg. "What the hell!" I exclaimed at the rebellious contraption. "If I wanted to collapse you, I would!"

I continued to battle with the barbecue and was consistently met with wobbly resistance. I managed to get it onto the back deck, only to have the huge bulbous grill topple dangerously near my already fearful toes. At this point I concluded that the barbecue was not collapsible, but completely totaled. The thought of returning the busted device to the basement tripled my heart rate, compelling me to abandon it where it was and return inside to figure out plan B.

Fortunately, I had already made these:

Salted pudding cookies

* 1 stick butter
* 1 egg
* 1/2 cup brown sugar
* 1 tbsp corn syrup
* 1 tsp vanilla
* 1/4 cup chocolate pudding mix
* scant 3/4 cup flour
* 1/2 tsp baking soda
* 3/4 tsp salt
* 1/2 cup chocolate chips
* 1 cup potato chips, crushed

Preheat oven to 350˚ F.

Cream butter and sugar. I added the pudding mix at this time too because I had turned my brain off at the time. It was not the best decision, as pudding mix definitely falls into the category of dry ingredient, but it worked out in the end and blended with the butter-sugar sufficiently.

Mix in the egg, vanilla and corn syrup. Add the dry ingredients (again, I'd recommend adding the pudding at this stage, rather than earlier) and stir until dough is formed. Mix in the chips x 2 and any other snacks you would like to encounter in the cookies.













Place on a baking sheet (greasing unnecessary, but un-harmful) and bake for 9-11 minutes. So good.